Summer is over and the chilly fall breeze has come in to relieve us. I’m personally a fall/spring girly, I always catch a lot of heat since spring is correlated with allergies but listen I would rather be sneezing on the way to the club rather being drenched in sweat on the way to the club. So I’m sure it’s been made clear, that I’m excited for summer to be over! Respectively of course, I love having the cycle of seasons but I’m officially over the heat and ready to snuggle up! This summer was, hard. It was filled with so many memories with my friends and family but without them the summer would have felt much more miserable.

Between grief and my internal dialogue, it was for sure a summer where I got to learn a lot about myself. That is the very exciting part of life though! It’s not always going to be easy when learning, but when you get to the end of the lesson you always feel some sort of pride looking back.

I’ve categorized each of my memories that I’m grateful for between spending it with friends, family, and myself. Looking back on this summer, I’m grateful for all the experiences I got to learn from.

New Experinces

Of course, the best time to gain new experiences is summer time! Everyone has days off, you can adventure to new places, and pull all nighters.

I’ve written about Sips quite a handful of times. The first few summers I experienced Sips was pure drinking and talking. But this year, I wanted it to be more than that, I wanted to experience the diverse restaurants that Philly had to offer. It also reminded me on how much fun it is to be a foodie and expose my taste buds beyond the restaurants I frequent. I’ve written about a couple of places we’ve tried in my other posts whether it was a quick mention or a full blown review, but it was just much more fun to really be in the moment with my friends during this time. Sips also helped with picking new hotspots whether for a night out with friends or just a quick take out night for myself all the while I’m not breaking the bank.

In contrast to being surrounded by my friends for such fun experiences, I also took myself out on solo dates! Because why am I going to wait around for someone absolutely perfect that meets my very high expectations to finally experience cool things in the city! I can just do it myself! I always made sure I took the whole day for myself too, starting with a delicious and filling breakfast, taking my time to get ready and pamper myself, then going out into the city to try things I’ve always wanted to see. For example, in case it wasn’t obvious, I love to eat and especially take the time to cook a big meal to cozy up with. So with that, there is this museum called the Science Institute, but they currently have a exhibit about the development of school lunches and what it means to feed kids healthy items to promote their growth. I thought maybe my friends will want to go? Maybe I can ask my sister? I can wait until everyone is free! Or… I can just take myself! And that’s just what I did. Then just after the museum I took a scenic and slow walk to the iconic Franklin Fountain through Old City where I got myself a strawberry vanilla milkshake. After a long day of walking, I wind down with some nice candles, a comfort meal, and video games.

Something my friends and I did more of was staying in! Which is ironic with Sips but once the weekend rolled around we actually found ourselves less likely to go out. With that being said, we still wanted an activity to do together. Which would result to a classic movie night, a cozy craft night or a home cooked meal for us to indulge in on for dinner nights. This was such a blast for my friends and I cause we were not actively destroying our bodies with alcohol and we were saving money but doing activities we love! Dinner nights were especially fun after I got to raid one of my friends cookbook collection and take pictures of the recipes that peaked my interest. Then I could turn around and pamper my hardworking friends with the recipe that also got filled with lots of love.

Entertainment

Now, I’ve made a post on here before about how to not be an alcoholic which not to call my friends and I that but we did have a phase where the weekly activity was usually going to bars and drinking. That was it! Over the summer we got to put a spin on it or just did something cheaper and more fulfilling all together! That is something I also truly love about my friends, they recognize bad/unhealthy patterns and do what we can to not permanently fall into those habits for life.

Celebrating friends beyond just a “get drunk” party. Since graduating, I already feel old age kicking in. This past summer just about the last of my friends had officially graduated from college and we got to celebrate them all summer long! We also had a couple birthdays along the way but my friends and I got to put celebration back into these events. We don’t want to just drink and forget we want to finally spend nights together after all the long lonely overworked ones in college. We want to build memories that last, play games together, and catch up on all the yap!

Beyond my tight knit group of friends, I also got to be more involved with the Morris Animal Refuge and some of their incredible fundraising events. One of the reasons I had originally joined their incredible organization was to have something extra to do during the work day, but it really become a place where I felt worth and saw opportunities. I got to make new friends all the while hanging out with some incredibly cute animals. I’ve got to meet new companies who align with the shelters initiative and learn more about Philly’s current shelter affairs as well as a deep dive into the shelters history. It has overall been just a really stimulating and rewarding experience beyond just playing with the animals but also understanding what actions the shelter takes to create a fulfilling and safe experience for not just the animals inside the shelter but after they leave as well.

About The Self

As I said earlier, this summer is definitely one of the hardest, however it was also the most productive. I didn’t spend my days wallowing and marinating in my sadness and panic. But rather saw how I was reacting and made an extra effort to help myself. Now I was not expecting a cure at the end of the summer but I definitely see a significant change to how I react to my panic or negative self talk. I’m not exactly sure what triggered it, but my self-esteem hit an all time low. I spoke more poorly of myself, I wanted to sleep in late and ignore the day, as well as just wanting to be somebody else all together. However, that was just continuing to push that internal narrative that I wasn’t pretty enough, or smart enough, or in general just not good enough.

So know that summer is over and I do notice small changes, what happened? I found new hobbies, I got more involved with the things that made me happy, and I really forced myself to learn about who I was. I was more than just a jumble of intrusive thoughts and heart-racing panic attacks. So what could I do to distract myself more during the day? I love to be creative and use me hands to distract me, so I picked up crocheting. With that I’m able to create things for raffles at my shelters for fundraising events, I can also make baby blankets for my neighbors so I know the little ones in the community are warm at night. Indulging can be seen as a sin, a reward for selling your soul for a 9-5, something that should be rare. But sometimes those indulgence can be what helps the community get basic necessities. What helps bring us connected and more fulfilled in contributing to your community.

At the end of it, I knew I needed to make myself fall back in love with…well… myself! I had changed a lot since the last time I’ve really had significant free time. The time that lets some thoughts run rampant and fester. It has not been easy and still a journey ahead of me but compared to how I felt at the beginning of the summer, hell, even few weeks ago, I’ve worked hard to make small footsteps, but powerful ones.

Heading into the New Season…

Heading into fall, I want to continue to see the growth in my wonderful friends and see what new seasonal adventures we get to go on. Not every day is going to be easy and not every week is going to be perfect. But instead of looking back on all the things I did wrong, whether in or out of my control, there is always times when my friends and family remind me what this is all about!

Thank you so much for reading! Have a wonderful day!